~Papercut89

Myeah... Why am I writing this? I'm not even in da anymore. And why am I not? Having a reason, maybe it's a bit stubborn, but life is. But why I am still doing this? No one won't read this anyway. Well, I live in hope that one person does, that's why.

Last summer I learned that even a person who sounds so great and loving can be everything else than that. Two people proved this. One of them was just random guy who was so lovey-dovey with me and few days later almost left me 'cause she wanted his ex back... Asked me back few mins later, but I said no. "let's make the decision when we meet in the amusement park".. Day before the meeting said that couldn't make it 'cause his mom had something else. Bastard lied, started with his ex. Well, no big deal, I am dating with girl who is more man than he ever was or could be.

Few weeks later I was finally going to meet with great friend of mine. Pen pals and best friends for three years, not bad, huh? Myeah, sounds great and all. We met at the railway station and went to city. Didn't really take more than 30-60 mins when she forgot I was there. Didn't talk to me, not even look at me. I was all alone there walking behind her and her sister saying nothing. Doesn't feel that good, ya know. I cried in the car when all of 'em where in the shop and I alone in the car. "Why in the hell did I come..?" was all I was thinking. Luckily I had my cell and I was able to talk with my great new friend who later became my lover. She cared, she listened, she kept company and we didn't know longer than 6 months and met once. Later she then started to talk with me. Second night there hurt me. We were with her little brother (great person) and suddenly she just decided to just watch how her little bro was in youtube. I just sat there and wondered what the hell? "I am here also, you know". Shit with it, I went to bathroom and then to sleep. Cried a bit in her room where we slept and after 10-15 mins she came in. How about the last days? Okay, I guess. Thanks to my cell and to her little bro. What disturbs me is that she didn't even notice I was lonely. Oh well, what can you really do about that? I had a nightmare about the situation like that year before the meeting, but didn't want to believe it would happen. Oh, it did. Now she doesn't talk to me at all. I knew this would happen when she got her com. And came to da. Yeah, there's the reason why I left. Being a friend of mine, sure, didn't even but me in her friends list. Didn't even bother to ask why. "Oh, I forgot completely" Sure you did, you forgot I was even alive. I didn't forget you. Still am suffering the idea of you pretending to be so great friend to people you won't even meet in real life. I can see that a friendship of three years doesn't really matter to you, okay, it's your life. You chose, now live with it. I won't turn my other cheek again. Thinking about that one time when you called me and talked the last 10 mins with your big sister while I was hanging on the other side reading and waiting. Then asked what I was doing and said goodbyes. Yeah, the phonecall of my life.

Hmm... Lots of shit.. Why I did all this? She won't even read it. Oh well, now I told all of it and wait what happens. But one thing.. If she does read this and for some reasons starts to cry in her journal what I said and makes her "da friends" get angry then... Get a life, guys. You have no right to call me with names since you don't know a thing about this situation. Well, what am I talking about again, I don't care.

Well, guess it's done now. Thank you if you read this thing. I tip my hat to you.